This post has been saved as a draft for DAYS AND DAYS because I kept hoping some stroke of genius would hit me. Sadly, it has not. I have found no magical remedy for when I feel grumpy for no legitimate reason. It worries me, this.
So! Here's what other people suggested. The number one idea was SLEEP. Which, yes. That is true. I usually do fall asleep when I am upset but it is usually because (a) it's bedtime or (b) I've exhausted myself from crying. Or both. I think when I am cranky I somehow become like a small child-- heaving and sobbing instead of just CALMING THE EFF DOWN AND TAKING A NAP. Okay. So I'll work on this. Feel cranky, go to sleep, wake up feeling better. Yes.
Other suggestions included the following:
Maybe I should keep those on a little cheat sheet or write them on my hand or something so that when I am feeling down I REMEMBER that things I enjoy do exist in this bleak desolate world.
Also, I've found that when someone around me is wearing grumpypants I ask them to tell me some of the things that they like. Anything at all, I say, name it! Hiking? Beer? Ponies? Gossip? Shoes? Hot tubs? Road trips? Friends? Music? Cuddling? I'm not sure if it works, but the theory is that thinking of things that make you happy in general might make you feel slightly better at the moment.
So there you have it: when I'm upset I turn into a weepy puddle-person but when YOU'RE upset I'm Fraulein Goddamn Maria.