Monday, October 28, 2013

Target Practice

Things I like about the new Target betwixt my work and home:
- There is a new Target on my way home from work
- It's NEW and it's TARGET and it's equidistant from my work and my home
- I could stop at Target on my way home from work
- I've been there twice now and both times they handed out $10 coupons at the register
- Tonight I bought a gift bag, which I hate buying. But it was only $1.43. (Did you know how expensive gift bags can be? The full priced ones of the same size as the one I bought were in the SIX DOLLAR range. For a thing that's meant to be the outer shell of a present!)
- Free parking
- I stopped at Target on my way home from work

Things I did not like about tonight's experience at the new Target betwixt my work and home:
- The guy in the Lady Items aisle where his girlfriend was trying to pick out the thing she needed and he was making fun of her and LAUGHING AT HER for being so picky and spending more money on the brand she liked. Oh, you think it's all a big joke, do ya, homeboy? You think it's silly for women to have PREFERENCES about those type of things that go in that very intimate, specific area? Oh, they all look the same to you, do they? I guess you'd know ALL ABOUT EVERYTHING TO DO WITH THIS, wouldn't you? Asshat. (Perhaps I was also so irritated with him for the very same reason I was in that aisle to begin with.)
- Falling up the stairs on the way to my car.
- The couple blocking the entire stairwell right after I fell and picked myself up. I thought they were making out at first (which I actually wouldn't have minded because, yeah, go for it) but it turned out that she was just shielding his face from the wind as he lit his cigarette. DO THAT ON YOUR OWN TIME, JERKS.
- The fact that other people seem to shop in this Target as well.

Whatever, I don't even care. There's a new Target! On my way home from work! My commute just got waaayyy better. But if this space isn't for me to air my grievances then what is it, really?

Wednesday, October 16, 2013

110. go on vacation with my whole family

Well this is a little (a lot) belated, but I've been accomplishing some things from my Life Scavenger Hunt so I figured maybe I should blog again, like, EVER.
Anyhow. This past summer my parents celebrated their 45th wedding anniversary. They decided to go to Hawaii. And then they made the mistake awesome decision to invite all of their children and grandchildren on the trip!
That was a total of 18 people.
Nine children and nine adults (three children plus their spouses, plus one daughter who is single (one of these things is not like the other and will potentially be a spinster forever no big deal)).
It was really fun.
We swam and snorkeled* and lounged and ate shave ice and celebrated two birthdays and drank fancy tropical drinkies and ate yummy foods and swam and swam and swam and hung out all together and it was just the best.

*I have learned that snorkeling is not an activity I enjoy. I can't breathe well enough through the snorkel so I'm constantly hyperventilating and getting water up my nose and listening to my own noisy breathing is SCARY SOUNDING. So I invented a new way to do it called GOGGLING. Basically I just wear goggles and swim underwater for as long as I can hold my breath and then resurface and I feel like a beautiful mermaid.
(My nephew: "Why are you weawing dose, Auntie Julia?"
Me: "Oh, I like this better than snorkels and masks because the mask always fills up water and the snorkel makes me feel like I'm going to die."
My nephew: "The mask doesn't fill up with wawter. And the snowkel makes you feel like you're going to live.")