I would bring these earrings.
And probably that dress that I'm wearing in the pic, too. I'm kicking myself for not getting a photo of it but how about this? Just imagine me in a long flattering, swishy dress that shows off my tattoo and can be dressed up or down, looking not unlike Aphrodite. And then when tipsy fabulous bloggers told me it was nice, I would say something like "Oh this old thing? It was $14 at Ross and I tried it on over my clothes!" because I can't just accept a compliment without being awkward.
But, alas, I will not be going to BlogHer this year. Last year, Miss Grace took me with her (told me what to wear, paid for my ticket, the works) in exchange for staying in my apartment and drinking PBR in the hot tub. I was wide-eyed about the whole thing and tended to freeze up when people asked me what my blog was about (my "blog" that I had started writing the previous month). We did have a fabulous time, though.
This year, they had the nerve to move it all the way to Chicago which is rather less convenient and more expensive. So instead of schmoozing and !!!!ing and cornering my favorite bloggers to recite my favorite things they have written, I'll be here. Jealous of you.