In order to keep up with this program I've become unable to keep up with various parts of my life that previously made me happy. First I stopped getting to bed at a reasonable time and became sleep deprived. Then I stopped exercising. Then I became really lousy at getting back to my friends and family (the best way to reach me is currently via text message). And now I don't watch TV anymore because I was planning to combine exercise and TV time and use the fancy machines downstairs but since I haven't made time to exercise, TV is gone too. And did I mention that my love life is.... oh I don't want to talk about it... ? Or that I don't know very many people in this city since I picked up my entire life and moved? Or that I also can't drown my sorrows in food because I have a very sensitive tummy and I need to eat things that won't aggravate it on weekdays? Having a drink or two seems to calm my nerves after a long day, but I really don't want to get to the point where I need to have 7 beers before I can start my homework. Even I recognize that as unhealthy.
I don't mean to complain or sound like I'm freaking out... I really am glad I'm doing this program and I feel like I'm learning a lot. It's just a very high stress, tough environment to be in. I'm really trying to keep myself together and make it through the year-- this week actually represents the midpoint of the first quarter (!!!!)-- but how can I do that if I have to push aside everything that keeps me sane and happy?
