Saturday, May 30, 2009

Chico Highlights

Here are some snippets of what went on during my adventure in Chico:
  • I drove two and a half hours, arrived at Stella's house which was full of small children (and a lovely, responsible babysitter) asking if I was going to meet their mommies and go dancing. I told them I was and they helped me pick out my outfit. Gabriel gave me a big snuggle, which was very sweet.
  • I arrived at the club. Miss Grace had told me to call when I got there and they would get the bouncer to let me in. So I stood awkwardly by the front of the club as I waited for them to do so. I noticed a guy sizing me up. He stepped over and asked me how I was doing. "Fine," I said. "Just waiting for my friends... they are already inside." He reached his hand out to me and I shook it, giving him a patronizing smile. "No, uh, your ID?" he said. He was one of the bouncers. I had assumed he was some asshole hitting on me when he was actually just trying to be nice and let me into the club.
  • I met up with the ladies and observed some scandalous behavior, the majority of which was exhibited by the married member of our group.
  • I was called "uptight" because I didn't want to go smoke weed at a house with some random guys including one with a pick in his hair.
  • I was called "judgmental" because I tried to get the whitest douchebag ever to explain to me why he was trying so hard to speak gangsta.
  • We met possibly the nicest girl on the planet-- after shutting down the club, we arrived at her house and made ourselves comfortable, eating noodles, drinking beers, and then realized that we had gone to the wrong house and didn't actually know anyone there. We explained this and the girl said it was cool and, uh, apparently tried to get me to go upstairs with her: "I have a shot in my bedroom. You want it?" I asked her what it was. "I don't remember. But it's in my bedroom." I politely declined and she went upstairs, presented us with a bottle of Belvedere and said she needed to go to bed soon. We said we would get going. As we were gathering our bearings, her boyfriend went upstairs to bed, leaving her downstairs. And I was highly offended by this. Um, hello, guy? Maybe don't go to bed and leave your inebriated girlfriend downstairs in the middle of the night with four COMPLETE STRANGERS, no matter how nice they seem. I would call that a boyfriend fail.
  • I experienced the tear-your-hair-out frustration that is Jenny's ex boyfriend.
  • I learned that it's best to be quiet and let your cab driver explain how he's kind of a big deal and flirt with (again) the married member of your group, because then he won't charge you.
  • I verified that going out in Chico is REALLY fun, especially if you keep an open mind and go where the night takes you. Even if you end up in bed with Jenny-- who will spoon you weather you like it or not.
There are photos of this extravaganza here.